


Why Hiccup Flinches

by Doctor_Discord



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Child Neglect, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Hurt Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Past Child Abuse, Protective Toothless (How to Train Your Dragon), Race To The Edge, poor hiccup, the gang opened up a can of worms and they weren't prepared for it, they're trying though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 22:04:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15543120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doctor_Discord/pseuds/Doctor_Discord
Summary: Takes place sometime in Season 3 of Race to the EdgeThe gang had noticed that Hiccup always seems to flinch around them. Confused and concerned, they decide to corner him and ask about it. They were not prepared for the answer.I am godawful at summaries but this is good I promise





	Why Hiccup Flinches

It had taken a painfully long time to figure out why Hiccup always flinched around them.

They each had several stories of this phenomenon, dating way back to just after Hiccup had awoken after defeating the monstrous Red Death. It always left them confused and worried, while Hiccup only laughed awkwardly and shrugged it off before resuming whatever it was they were doing. They never knew what to think.

The most recent to have happened for each of them had all taken place on Dragon’s Edge, their own little paradise beyond the borders of the archipelago they called home. For Astrid, she had gotten a little frustrated with the twins and Snotlout. She and Hiccup were trying to corral them and knock some sense into their thick skulls after they’d ‘accidentally’ released the boars from the twins’ stupid boar pit, poor Fishlegs and Meatlug having the unfortunate task of rounding _those_ beasts up. In a fit of anger, she’d thrown her hands into the air, fists clenched as her teeth ground together. When she’d looked back at the young heir, she found him crouched down slightly, arms raised above his head, like he was shielding himself from something, bracing himself, his eyes squeezed shut. Gradually, she dropped her arms, facial expressions melting into one of concern. Even Snotlout, Ruff, and Tuff had turned their heads. Slowly, Hiccup had uncurled from his position, and, after stammering out an excuse, had run off, calling for Toothless, leaving the other dragon riders more than a little concerned.

Snotlout’s was even more confusing. Hiccup had been helping him repair his hut after Hookfang had set it on fire. Again. Naturally, he’d been complaining and griping about his ‘stupid, pig-headed dragon’ while Hiccup just chuckled and held pieces of wood in place for Snotlout to nail down. After a particularly foul remark, Snotlout had brought the hammer down a little too hard, and Hiccup jerked away, crossing his arms over his chest and hiding his hands. The bigger teen had raised an eyebrow questioningly, giving his cousin a strange look as Hiccup cleared his throat and moved his hands back to the board, face blank. Clearly, he wanted the move to remain unquestioned, and Snotlout just shrugged and obeyed the unspoken command, silently worry about his cousin’s strange movement.

Fishlegs was always the most concerned after one of these ‘episodes’ happened in front of him. His most recent experience had been just after he’d found that ancient sword and escaped from the albino Night Terrors. He and Hiccup and gone off to ‘geek out’ about the cool, new weapon in the knowledge-enthusiasts hut. About an hour into their fawning, Fishlegs had raised the sword experimentally over his head, still talking about how to decipher the strange runes. When he finally managed to tear his eyes away from the sword and back to Hiccup, he was a bit shocked to find the first dragon rider crouched down low, his face buried between his knees and his arms covering the back of his head. Quickly dropping the weapon, Fishlegs called out, in the softest voice he could manage, “Hiccup?” The noise only made Hiccup flinch more, curling into a tighter ball. But then the blonde teen blinked, and suddenly Hiccup was standing again, brushing the dirt of his armor and talking as if nothing had happened. When Fishlegs tried to ask any questions regarding what he’d just seen, Hiccup only spoke louder, intentionally drowning him out, until Fishlegs gave up and dropped it, much to Hiccup’s relief.

By far the most strangest one to have happened was with the twins. They had all just come back from an incredibly successful mission of blasting dragon hunter ships into oblivion. The twins, being their usual, hyperactive, quirky selves, had both turned to Hiccup, raising their hands in unison for a high five. They weren’t expecting Hiccup the flinch. Hard. He would’ve stumbled right off the edge of the platform had Tuffnut not caught him. Faced with the confused, scrutinizing eyes of the other riders, Hiccup had muttered something under his breath, jumped onto Toothless, and soared across to the other side of the island.

So yes, it had taken them an unbearably long amount of time to realize why Hiccup did this around them. Even then, they didn’t _really_ figure it out.

They’d cornered him and asked.

They found him in his hut, buried deeply in his work and muttering to himself with Toothless napping at his side. They slipped in unnoticed, the sound of Hiccup’s automatic door opening and closing masked by the young man’s frustrated shout as he banged his fist on the desk, crumpling up an assumed failed blueprint and tossing it over his shoulder, causing Snotlout to duck.

“What am I going to do, Toothless? This stupid thing doesn’t want to work!” Hiccup placed his head on the desk after letting out a defeated sound as the Night Fury cracked open an eye. Said eye immediately narrowed once Toothless saw the other riders in the room. He growled softly before standing and resting his head in Hiccup’s lap, purring reassuringly.

Setting her resolve, Astrid stepped forward. “Hiccup.”

The first dragon rider jumped, slamming his knees into the underside of his desk and alarming Toothless. “Gah!” He spun around, eyes widening when he spotted his audience. “Wh-wh-wh-what are you guys doing here?! You-you-you couldn’t have knocked?” He scratched the back of his head nervously, his other hand occupied with petting and soothing the startled Night Fury, though Astrid had seen him pull this move enough times to know that it was more of a comfort for him than the dragon.

She placed her hands on her hips, studying him carefully. “Why do you always flinch around us?”

He instantly adverted his gaze, preferring to focus all of his attention on Toothless. “I-I-I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Uh, clearly you do,” Snotlout chimed in. “Otherwise you’d be staring at us instead of Toothless.”

Hiccup just bowed his head, completely hiding his face. “Fine, yes, I do know what you are talking about.” He surprised everyone by letting out a mirthless chuckle. “Though, if you don’t know by now _why_ , I wonder if I should even tell you.”

Fishlegs tapped his fingers together. “Please, Hiccup…we just want to help.”

Hiccup finally raised his head, looking each of them in the eye. He seemed composed on the outside, but when they looked closer they saw how completely, utterly _terrified_ he really was. “You…really don’t know?”

Unanimously, they shook their heads.

The young Viking heir sighed, bowing his head again and hunching his shoulders. Toothless crooned, concern glowing in his wide eyes. Hiccup immediately reached out a hand to reassure the dragon, delaying the inevitable. “It’s…it’s a symptom of physical abuse.”

Silence rang heavy through the other dragon riders as Hiccup continued. “Before the dragons, before _Toothless_ I was far from the most liked person on Berk. The whole village physically, mentally, and emotionally abused and neglected me for _years_. For the first fifteen years of my life I couldn’t take one step out of my house without being sneered at or insulted in some way. I was _always_ covered in bruises, most of which were inflicted by Snotlout, though some were caused by my clumsy, awkward nature.” The burly Viking looked away, visibly cringing when he was mentioned by name. Hiccup didn’t even notice. He was finally opening up, and his words just poured out, talking faster and growing slightly hysterical. “My own father could never _quite_ look me in the eye. Do you even _know_ what that feels like? To have your father, the only family you have left, be so ashamed of you that he can’t even _look_ at you? It’s…soul-crushing.

“Do you realize how jarring it was for me, after the Red Death? I wake up from what was essentially a coma with a metal leg, a dragon in my house, and all the people who’ve hated me my whole life cheering and praising me outside my door. I nearly passed out again from the shock alone. But-but-but I think the worst was…you guys.” If Hiccup heard the shocked gasps, he didn’t show it, just gave a half-delirious laugh. “I-I mean, the twins used to hold me down and _laugh_ while Snotlout beat the _shit_ out of me! The-the-they broke my arm once, and Snotlout’s bruised or-or cracked my ribs more times than I can count! And Astrid…” His sentence trailed off as he swallowed thickly. Astrid felt her soul shatter in that moment, even as Hiccup continued to speak “Then suddenly you’re all patting me on the back and joking around with me and racing me around the island on dragons like you’ve _always_ been my friends, like the fact that you used to torture me for your own amusement never happened. But the craziest part is…I’ve forgiven you all for… _all_ of it.”

Hiccup finally raised his head, and the horrified riders saw the tears streaming down his face. “I have, I don’t know why or how, but I’ve forgiven _everyone_. My dad for the blatant neglect, the whole village for the ridicule, you guys for the abuse…” He swallowed again, wrapping his arms around Toothless and pulling the dragon closer. “After I defeated the Red Death…I noticed the flinching too, a-and I went to see Gothi about it. And she just looked so… _sad_ , I knew it wasn’t anything good. Basically, while I may have forgiven you and put it all in the past, my brain doesn’t quite grasp that you won’t just jump me and revert back to the old days. It’s kind of like an involuntary paranoia, just my brain making my body brace itself for what it thinks is inevitable.” He buried his face in Toothless’ scales; the Night Fury purred in comfort and nuzzled his rider back.

There was a heavy, pregnant pause after the end of Hiccup’s speech. The twins, who had been surprisingly quiet and well-behaved through the entire experience, were the ones to speak up first, Tuffnut starting the sentence with Ruffnut finishing it.

“Hiccup–”

“–you know we would never–”

“Yes, I know you guys would never intentionally, or, _super_ intentionally, hurt me again.” Hiccup glanced up, the corner of his mouth twitched upwards in the beginnings of a genuine smirk, though it quickly fell. “But fifteen years is hard to erase. I-I-I’m sorry guys…”

Astrid couldn’t believe her ears. “Sorry,” she spluttered, shocked. “Why are _you_ apologizing to _us_?! _We_ should be the ones–”

A low, threatening growl rumbled through the air at her sudden outburst, and suddenly the other dragon riders were distinctly reminded of _why_ the Night Fury was the most feared dragon in the archipelago. It was easy to forget when Toothless was bouncing around like an excited puppy or smiling his gummy grin at his beloved rider while Hiccup laughed and scratched his chin. But, right now, the Night Fury’s teeth were _very_ noticeable, his toxic-green eyes narrowed to slits and his pupils slimmed to almost invisible black lines as he glared at them, rage palpable. He curled around Hiccup protectively, wings raised in a way that almost obscured the young Viking from view. He clearly did not approve of the sudden, loud noise when his rider was so vulnerable.

A single, pale hand was seen rubbing the dragon’s head, soothing him slightly, and Hiccup’s voice rang out once more. “The first time I came to Toothless, who was still trapped in the cove, covered in fresh bruises and wincing with every movement, he was _furious_. If he’d been able, he probably would’ve soared right out of that cove and hunted you guys down. I think the only thing that stopped him from trying was the fact that I was hurt. I didn’t go home that night; I spent it wrapped in his wings as he mothered me, literally licking my wounds and making sure I was okay. That was the safest and…most loved I had ever felt. Ever. Of course, my dad was furious the next morning, but that didn’t matter to me. I had finally, _finally_ found someone who loved and appreciated me for…me. Just me. No heroic battle, no lost limb, no _‘Oh my Thor, you’re the dragon tamer!’_ Just Hiccup.”

Toothless let out the softest sound, something the other riders didn’t even know was possible for a dragon to make, as he turned his head to rest it in Hiccup’s lap again. Hiccup let out a choked sob before continuing. “When he first properly met you guys, I had to physically hold him back from tearing you guys to shreds, because he _knew_ you. He knew who you were. Every time I came to the cove limping or crying or-or both, he’d commit your scent to memory. So, when he saw you, he instantly recognized your scent, and his first instinct was to hurt the people who’s hurt me so badly.”

Toothless closed his eyes, purring and rubbing his head all over his rider, making Hiccup laugh breathlessly through his tears. But when the dragon opened his eyes again, he was looking straight at the small group of people with those slit pupils, sending icy shivers down their spines, and leaving them with a distinct, unwavering fact.

Hiccup may have forgiven them, but his best friend and beloved Night Fury most certainly had _not_.

The young heir wiped his eyes and sniffed, then sheepishly looked up at them. “Um. Sorry, that just kind of…came out. Believe me, it was not my intention to spill you my whole life’s story, or call any of you out, but you asked and it just kind of…happened.” Suddenly, he flinched again, covering his face, even though none of them had moved. “Oh my Gods, please don’t hate me, I didn’t mean to make you feel guilty or anything, and please don’t tell my dad, or Gobber, I just–”

In half a second, Astrid was flying at Hiccup, pulling him upright and into a tight, bone-crushing hug. While Hiccup stood stiffly, stunned by her embrace, the young Viking woman took the moment to whisper in his ear. “Don’t you _ever_ –” she hissed, hugging him tighter, “–apologize for the _bullshit_ we put you through. _Never_. It’s not your fault, it never was. _Please_ never blame yourself. This was a…wake-up call we really needed.”

Hiccup let out a half-strangled noise. He still had yet to return her embrace. “Astrid, I–”

“ _Group hug_!”

Tuffnut’s enthusiastic shout was the only warning the two got before they were nearly knocked flat onto the floor by the giggling twins in a surprisingly heartfelt hug, quickly joined by Fishlegs and Snotlout. In a matter of moments, Hiccup was surrounded by his friends, literally being embraced by their undying love, care, and support. Even Toothless had joined in, curling around the half-laughing half-sobbing group of humans.

Hiccup attempted a laugh, though the sound came out more like a whimper. Finally, slowly, he wrapped his arms tightly around Astrid, burying his face in her shoulder. “Thank you, so much, for…everything. I-I’ll try to do better–”

“No.” Snotlout’s voice came from over his shoulder, surprising soft and comforting. “Just…no, Hiccup. It’s _us_ who should try to accommodate for you. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Yeah!” Fishlegs beamed from behind Astrid. “We could come up with some ways to, like, help you reassociate things, to reprogram your brain. It’ll definitely be slow, and probably difficult, but I think we can erase all of those old reflexes.”

“We know we don’t deserve it–” Ruffnut began, mumbling into his shoulder.

“–and we really, _really_ don’t deserve it–” Tuffnut cut in, a glimpse of his usual drama peeking through.

“–but we need you to trust us, Hiccup. We just want to help.” Ruff accentuated her sentence by squeezing the young Viking briefly. Hiccup responded in kind by leaning into the touch.

Unanimously, the group backed away, leaving Hiccup standing alone in the circle of his friends, Toothless quickly taking their place and wrapping around him protectively like a giant cat. Once again he found himself crying silently, but he was smiling softly as he stared down at the floorboards, watching Toothless’ flank rise and fall with his even breaths. “I…I don’t…thanks. I have…no idea where to even begin, I just…”

Suddenly, his eyelids began to droop as exhaustion crashed over him. He stumbled, tripping over Toothless’ tail, but before he could hit the ground he was wrapped in soft, velvety wings, the Night Fury’s chest rumbling with his purrs as he was pulled close. Distantly, he heard Astrid say, “Get some sleep, Hiccup. This has probably been really exhausting for you.” She had barely finished her sentence before he had closed his eyes and drifted off to a deep, dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Yo so I was wondering if this maybe needed a brief little segment afterwards from the gang's pov??? I dunno, comment if you think it needs it


End file.
